What a beautiful family

There is a problem in America.

Well, there are many problems but one problem that affects my family the most is the lack of positive two parent Black families in our country. Some people may be thinking, "What? There are plenty of two parent Black families." and to that I say, "Name ten."

Now I am well aware that the family structure in our country has changed/is changing but take it from me when I say that the two parent Black family is almost non existant. Interested in reading a little more about it? Click here.

Prompted by Moynihan’s still-unpublished study, [President] Johnson delivered a speech at the Howard University commencement that called for “the next and more profound stage of the battle for civil rights.” The president began his speech with the era’s conventional civil rights language, condemning inequality and calling for more funding of medical care, training, and education for Negroes. But he also broke into new territory, analyzing the family problem with what strikes the contemporary ear as shocking candor. He announced: “Negro poverty is not white poverty.” He described “the breakdown of the Negro family structure,” which he said was “the consequence of ancient brutality, past injustice and present prejudice.” “When the family collapses, it is the children that are usually damaged,” Johnson continued. “When it happens on a massive scale, the community itself is crippled.”Source

So what does that mean for myself and my husband? Well for one, it's pretty lonely. We have yet to find a two parent Black family that we can interact with on a regular basis. Heck, it's hard enough finding a two parent family of any racial and ethnic background but trying to find one where the individuals have similarities that originate from a core place, is nearly impossible. That also means when we go out, sometimes, it feels like we are the only ones and at times it warrants unwanted attention. Now there are times when I like perfect strangers coming up to us and commenting on our family and how beautiful they think we are. Other times it makes me extremely self conscious, as if I have to represent something larger than just my family of four which isn't fair.

What does this all mean for my children? Well it means if they choose to marry someone who is Black, that person is more likely than coming from a non traditional family (don't we all?). Which poses all sorts of challenges.

Now I know I'm speaking in generalities and there are best and worse case scenarios to everything I've said but the fact remains: It's lonely here, where we stand.


And just because I can't help myself:

-M